Let me start at the beginning. I didn’t play video games at all as a child. Unless I was at a friend’s house or arcade, gaming wasn’t something I did. My parents wanted me to focus on my school and not waste time playing games.
Fast forward to me becoming an adult. I dated and moved in with a guy who had a PS2. While he was at work, I played a lot of different games ranging from first person shooters (I’m terrible at them btw) to racing and fighting games (which I’m awesome at btw).
Then after I broke up with him, I started my adult life of meeting guys. Of course I was attracted to the nerdy types. A lot of them assumed because I was girly that when I said I liked video games it meant that I just liked them, not that I was good at them.
I always think back to one day when I was at my ex’s house and there was around 10 guys playing Tekken. I was there in my jean mini skirt and flip flops with a polo shirt (the southern girl summer uniform), and I said these words, “Don’t go easy on me.” Maybe they thought I was just saying that. Maybe they thought that I was some kind of feminist, or maybe the first couple of guys I played against were actually that terrible. I was pretty much saying, “Next victim? After beating each of their assess one by one.”
I knew I found love when I met a guy who I said, “Don’t go easy on me,” as we played Soul Caliber. And he beat me, with only a few seconds on the clock with him remaining with maybe 2% of his HP. By the way I married this man in 2008.
So now my game of choice is MMORPGs. And frankly I hate most girl gamers I meet. You have this idea that you’re going to meet other girls like you, yet you don’t. And you meet girls that are spreading very negative stereotypes about women who game, and it hurts all of us.
1. Don’t assume I heal because I’m a girl. No I really don’t. It is true that every female gamer I’ve met has been a healer in some capacity, but it isn’t why I heal, and it isn’t why they heal. To be a good healer, it is a hard job. We aren’t just there to keep our boyfriends/husbands alive, we do it because it is fun and a challenge. Also…don’t assume I only heal. Guys are always surprised when they find out I tank. Not only that, they are shocked when they find out that I’m actually a very good tank. In fact some have said I’m one of the best they’ve ran with.
2. Don’t assume I need free stuff. Trust me, I won’t turn down free stuff, but I will only take it if I know you regularly give free stuff to your guy friends as well. I think it hurts girl gamers when other girls are essentially digital whores. Willing to flirt (or go further) with any guy who will give them free stuff. It really gives us all a bad name.
3. You don’t need to mind your manners. I’m cool with your jokes as long as they aren’t sexist, racist, or homophobic. That’s not because I’m a woman, that’s because I’m a decent human being. Feel free to have a dirty mouth. Just don’t be surprised about what comes out of mine. Seriously don’t be shocked by what I say.
Need I say more? And that’s TAME for me!
4. I don’t hate all girl gamers. No seriously I don’t. I’ve actually met some awesome females like me while gaming. Also most of my real life friends game as well. I just hate girls who use the fact that they have a vagina to get what they want…much like girls in the real world. I also don’t find it fair to poor guys to be strung along because someone wants free stuff, in game or otherwise. In real life, we call these women golddiggers. So in game should we call them gildiggers?creditdiggers?kinahdiggers? oh some games they are actually gold diggers.
You know that you’ve reached legit girl gamer status when the guys you play with don’t think of you ask the chick in the group. You’re just one of the guys. They ask you to heal, not because you are a girl, but because you are the best healer available. They ask you to tank, because they know you’re good at it. Hope that you meet other awesome girls like you because they make the best friends ever!